On Death, Memory, and Discovery

I just finished reading the most delightful book! The Likely Resolutions of Oliver Clock is written by Jane Riley, an Australian woman, and has quirky British humor throughout, even while dealing with things that could be considered morbid—and sometimes because of said morbidity. I read bits of it aloud to Jeff and we were laughing out loud together over the zany characters and descriptions. The main character is highly fastidious and leads a very regimented life. He runs the family funeral parlor and is obsessive about ironing his clothes, including his underwear. Practically an old man, although he’s only 39. Can he find himself and break free? I won’t give anything away, but this was one of those books I was sad to finish. I was so immersed in the story and in love with the characters I never wanted it to end.


Serendipitously, we watched a movie over the weekend that was a perfect match thematically. Both treated the topics of death and dying, relationships, and how we choose to keep and hold onto memories. Surprisingly, both also dealt with (slight spoiler alert) the discovery of being loved by someone who has already passed on.

The movie, called After Life, also dealt with the topic of death using a gentle sense of humor, and moments of sheer delight. It reminds me of how my friend Cari used to refer to the things that will become clear in the hereafter as, “the great DVD in the sky.” This movie has a similar take. A random group of people interview new intakes as they cross the threshold after death, and help them choose a favorite memory to capture on film before they move on to the next realm. 

The salient question is: If you could choose just one memory to hold onto forever, what would it be? Jeff and I asked each other this question after the movie ended. He talked about meeting me for the first time, pulling up to my missionary apartment in Burbank, and that first conversation we had, right there on the doorstep. I chose another favorite day, when we were dating. I found out he was back in town unexpectedly. He tracked me down at my grandma’s house, and I drove home to meet him. It’s the best story and totally makes me smile every time I think about it.Ironically, my second choice was the day my mom passed away. I literally felt the veil part, and experienced so much love and light and joy seep through, welcoming her on the other side. I’ll never forget the experience, which completely eclipsed my grief, and strengthened my faith in a higher power and the continuance of life beyond this mortal sphere.

I got an advance copy of The Likely Resolutions of Oliver Clock through Amazon Prime. The book’s official release (and when my audiobook will arrive, a little too late…haha) is February 2.

The movie was made back in 1998 but is still timely and relevant. It was directed by Hirokazu Koreeda, who also directed Like Father, Like Son and Shoplifters, two other great Japanese films.